This is...The Beginning.
The beginning of an epic journey. A journey not to be repeated or surpassed. The great nation of America was founded in 1776 simply because it knew that 232 years later there would be four girls, four women, four mother hucking sisters who would attempt to partake on such a journey: "So crusty it could walk alone." Thong. We have been planning, plotting, googlemapping, documenting and emailing for weeks and weeks, and now it comes down to the final week before our departure. Thus we make the blog.
Two things to know:
(1) Ouch! Charley Bit ME!: We have a woolly mammoth. His name is Charley le Chien. He is an Old World gentleman that hails from the outskirts of Paris. He likes his buttered toast in the morning, an occasional orange in the afternoon, heavy petting and is, just so you know, the best company in bed. Charley stays on his own side of the bed, doesn't heat up the sheets, and is the best cuddle-r this side of the hemisphere. In short, Charley is amazzzing.
(2) Sisterhood of the Travelling Thong: So we haven't updated our hepatitis shots... and we're planning to use public restrooms. FML. Also, there's swine flu in the air (is it contractable via the southern route?) and the momma's are tre-worried about our sitch... Note to self: make appointments for the following vaccines: Hepatitis, Yellow fever, Herp (futile), Guaradasil, and pregnancy. Also must ask doc: Is sharing a single thong between three girls for two months a health hazard?
The beginning of an epic journey. A journey not to be repeated or surpassed. The great nation of America was founded in 1776 simply because it knew that 232 years later there would be four girls, four women, four mother hucking sisters who would attempt to partake on such a journey: "So crusty it could walk alone." Thong. We have been planning, plotting, googlemapping, documenting and emailing for weeks and weeks, and now it comes down to the final week before our departure. Thus we make the blog.
Two things to know:
(1) Ouch! Charley Bit ME!: We have a woolly mammoth. His name is Charley le Chien. He is an Old World gentleman that hails from the outskirts of Paris. He likes his buttered toast in the morning, an occasional orange in the afternoon, heavy petting and is, just so you know, the best company in bed. Charley stays on his own side of the bed, doesn't heat up the sheets, and is the best cuddle-r this side of the hemisphere. In short, Charley is amazzzing.
(2) Sisterhood of the Travelling Thong: So we haven't updated our hepatitis shots... and we're planning to use public restrooms. FML. Also, there's swine flu in the air (is it contractable via the southern route?) and the momma's are tre-worried about our sitch... Note to self: make appointments for the following vaccines: Hepatitis, Yellow fever, Herp (futile), Guaradasil, and pregnancy. Also must ask doc: Is sharing a single thong between three girls for two months a health hazard?
DEFinitely not a health risk. Good thing Clarissa plugged up Charlie's bunghole by sewing a William and Mary patch over it. Charlie will probably get the least STDs on this trip. One - because his bunghole is covered. Two - because he is a mammoth and he pees outside and he is also a boy so....that is just not something we need to get in to. Three - Charlie will not be wearing the thong. We will not let Clarissa put the thong on Charlie. We will try REAL hard to save him from this catastrophic event.
The idea of a crotchless thong has been presented to us...we are still considering all of our options.
Long story short - we can't wait to get started west to meet up with POCH in San Francisco!!! Along with many much stops on the way west including: Ultimate Nationals in Ohio, Chicago (PEGGY!!!), the Badlands, Mount Rushmore, Devils Tower (Alien Phallus), Big Horn Canyon, Glacier, MT, the skinny phallus part of I-DA-HOEEEEEEEEE, Spokane and Seattle, WA, Mt Rainier (ie Mt Manure - Clarissa) Mt. St. Helen's, Oregon (secret lovers), Redwoods National Forest, Pacific Coast Highway (PCH - POCH SANS VOWELS), then Poch in San Francisco.
From San Francisco back East...yeah...uh we don't know what's going on either.
As you can see - we have our work cut out for us. Please keep your eyes out for updates as we travel west. You will not regret wasting your time reading the updates. After all - everyone knows how entertaining Clarissa can be in a back seat...for 3000 miles.....praise Jesus hallelujah.
Love,
ChristyBALLS, Jess2, and ClarClar - oh and Charlie
The idea of a crotchless thong has been presented to us...we are still considering all of our options.
Long story short - we can't wait to get started west to meet up with POCH in San Francisco!!! Along with many much stops on the way west including: Ultimate Nationals in Ohio, Chicago (PEGGY!!!), the Badlands, Mount Rushmore, Devils Tower (Alien Phallus), Big Horn Canyon, Glacier, MT, the skinny phallus part of I-DA-HOEEEEEEEEE, Spokane and Seattle, WA, Mt Rainier (ie Mt Manure - Clarissa) Mt. St. Helen's, Oregon (secret lovers), Redwoods National Forest, Pacific Coast Highway (PCH - POCH SANS VOWELS), then Poch in San Francisco.
From San Francisco back East...yeah...uh we don't know what's going on either.
As you can see - we have our work cut out for us. Please keep your eyes out for updates as we travel west. You will not regret wasting your time reading the updates. After all - everyone knows how entertaining Clarissa can be in a back seat...for 3000 miles.....praise Jesus hallelujah.
Love,
ChristyBALLS, Jess2, and ClarClar - oh and Charlie
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